This is the vibe I’m craving this October. It’s ridiculous how versatile Jim Hension effects were.

This was actually my first time watching the movie. I have vague memories of seeing bits of it as a very young child. Young enough that I’m not sure if I haven’t actually not seen the movie, or just repressed most of the nightmare fuel bits. So much screaming and fish eye. Either way, the scenes I remembered have stuck with me for over a quarter century and today I was in the perfect mood to witness the full thing.

Half way through I decided to check in to trak.tv and I learned that there’s a 2020 of this movie. Often I’m interested in the modern camp flare of remakes, but the screen shots I saw just made me sad. So much of what makes this movie is its textures and visual distortions. It doesn’t look like they even tried to capture that in the new version.

Tintin 2011 must be one of the most under appreciated movies in history. I saw it when it came to theatre and I loved it, but now, having had to look up its release date, I’m pretty sure I saw a re-release of it and didn’t know of it’s existance in 2011. That sounds insane to me.

None the less, Breadsword’s video might make up for the lack of hype with pure depth. Bringing together the characters of Tintin with their hollywood portrayers, creator, real world history, alternative in-world history, and the monolithic accomplishment it all was.

Now, I don’t actually believe in spoilers, but at an hour and sixteen minutes, you might as well use that time to watch the actual film first if you haven’t already. As incredible as Georges Remi was, I think that actually seeing the film is probably the most important thing to help continue his legacy… or maybe just buying the books. I think they’re still in print. I dunno.

Tomorrow is Truth and Reconciliation Day.

I had a friend ask what that was, so I told him about the bodies from Residential Schools, and how that was just the tip of the iceberg. He said “Wow, now that’s proof that the government is out to get us. It’s really us vs them.” Now, I can’t speak to priority of class issues in my friend’s background, but I can say that for white upper-middle class Canadians like me, we are the Them in “us vs them”. We can point the blame at our government and churches, but they were still our government, and our churches. Our inaction has caused just as much destruction as the actions that were delberately designed to destroy.

Now the narrative is often being shifted to how vaccines are the governments new weapon of choice. And it’s true that medicine has been weaponized against visible minorities in the past, and still today, but as far as the covid vaccines go, our wealthy and privledged have been the first in line to get the vaccines and we’ve been caught giving expired vaccines to first nations people. That’s not a narrative that victimizes my people. It’s the same narrative of us taking from those that need it, then trying to cut off access before they can get it.

I really want to do, and be part of something better.

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Okay. It’s been long enough for me to feel confident about my depression medicine experience. I’m so. So. Lucky. I’m just over 2 months in and I feel great. Like literally, if you asked me “how are you doing?” I could honestly say “I feel happy”. That’s never been the case, as far as I know. It’s been that way for at least 2 weeks now. It’s been a bit of a journey, so here’s a break down.

• week 1: drowsy + insomia + poor apetite + can’t orgasm + salt and starch over power other tastes
• week 2: drowsy + poor apetite + can’t orgasm
• week 3: drowsy + lower sex drive
• week 4: drowsy to the point that I suggest to my doctor that I can’t keep this up. He says try another month…ok.
• week 5: I stop drinking diet sodas and start taking Seed probiotics Two days later I feel amazing.
• week 6: No issues. I have some trouble getting up in the morning, but I always seem to have enough energy in the day.
• week 7: Great. I need to figure out if this is the Escitalopram, or the seed pills, so I stop taking the seed pills.
• week 8: Great, but i run out of escitalopram.
• week 8.6: I still feel great. Not sleeping as deeply, but still lots of energy, maybe even better social performance than usual. I get my pescription refil.
• week 9.2: Overly relaxed. I’m stretching a lot and trying not to sleep in, but I still feel great. I’m confident that my fasting from Seed pills and diet soda has done next to nothing compared to the escitalopram.

What a weird journey. My last walk in got a different Doctor. Even if I don’t pay attention to the name and voice over the phone, I can still tell because new doctors always ask if I’ve tried to kill myself lately. He said the typical protocol is to use the medication for 6 months, if effects have been positive, then stop… Sounds odd. I’m liking that I lasted 4 days without it, so maybe my chronic mental illness has a chance of correcting itself, long term, after 6 months of seratonin support?

Whatever, it’s so amazing to feel like I always thought I should be able to feel like. I’ll take what I can get for now. And I realize how super privledged I am to have things work out so easily. I don’t know what I would have done if I had to keep digging to find the right medication. Maybe one more time, maybe two more times, to what? Develop a habbit? I mean, it took me 11 years since my last therapist visit to actually get proper medication. It’s a hard sell, if you don’t know.

It sucks, but if you’re in that position, please keep fighting. I at least know that things that have always felt wrong do have the possibility of feeling right, so keep trying please.